Wednesday, May 6, 2009

On Hiatus

Well...I woke up today and decided that I need a break from blogging.

Yes, I know you've all become dependent upon my steady stream of antisocial commentaries, nonsensical rants, and tales of bodily emissions and uncomfortable situations. Still, a man's gotta listen to his gut. And my gut says it wants a summer without having to entertain you ungrateful fucks. My gut says it wants more time inactively sitting on the couch getting aroused by Gossip Girl, 90210, and The No. 1 Ladies' Detective Agency. My gut says it wants a beef, egg, and chicharon burrito from Chubbys. So, effective immediately, TheIronMike.com is on temporary hiatus.

Don't worry! This isn't a situation like Undeclared or Andy Richter Controls the Universe, where they say the show is on hiatus, then go and cancel it because of low ratings. TheIronMike.com is one of the most highly viewed web sites (within the southeastern portion of the West Washington Park area of Metropolitan Denver). It's also the basis for Ghost Road Press's newest book Spew, set to be released in early Fall. Yeah, it'll be a retread of all the shit you've already read, but it will be bound and it will have very sexy pictures of me (naked, and also bound).

I'll be back blogging sometime in August (if I live that long). Until then, buy my old book, Battery Acid For The Soul (it can be had used for as little as $2.75 - that's cheaper than a pack of generic cigarettes). Then, save your pennies for the arrival Spew. If you don't buy it, I will hunt you down and kill you and your children and your pets. Or, I'll just be sad.

Sorry to the bearer of such bad news, but I felt you deserved a heads up. It's better to blog out than to fade away. Fuck Neil Young and fuck substituting "blog" for words in notable quotes! That's all I got, for now.

You'll be fine!