Thursday, September 4, 2008

Impale Palin!

If you look up Cunt in the dictionary, you'll find a big picture of Republican Vice Presidential Nominee Sarah Palin. If you look up Sarah Palin in the dictionary, you'll find the words, "See Cunt".

I used to think Dan Quayle's doppelganger was just a stupid white trash whore who liked Jesus too much. However, after seeing her shrill (yes, I said it too, Harry Reid) performance last night, I think she might be the biggest cunt in the entire world.

In light of her ridiculous tirade, I've decide to put together a list of people (and animals) I like more than Sarah Palin. It would have been easier to just say "everyone", but this is more fun.

So, without further adieu, I present Iron Mike's List of People (and Animals) He Likes Better Than Sarah Palin:

- Rudy Giulian (but not by much)
- Bristol Palin, the political child most likely to have a sex tape within the next 2 years
- Anne Coulter (yes, there's somebody I like less than Anne Coulter)
- Mr. Fontana, the assistant principal at my junior high
- Kim Jung Il (Sarah looks a lot like him)
- Allison from the best episode of Intervention ever
- The cop who gave me a DUI, just like Todd Palin
- The 2 Girls from 2 Girls 1 Cup
- Peggy Noonan, especially after her live mic remarks
- The guy who made a hat out of his hair
- Mel Gibson, Michael Richards and Dog the Bounty Hunter
- Xiguang, the heroin-addicted elephant
- Dick Cheney (Yes, Dick Cheney!)
- Trig Palin, the Corky of the New Millenium
- The idiot I punched for messing with my wife
- Babar
- Every Eskimo except for Yup'iks
- Bill O'Reilly (at least he has an excuse for being an asshole -- he has a VERY small penis)
- Todd Palin's business partner
- Jerry Lewis with his bloated face
- James Dobson (I'm only kidding)
- The Penis Fencing Flatworms
- Walter Monegan, the victim of Troopergate
- Angel Pantoja Medina, the Puerto Rican who got buried standing up
- The Jonas Brothers, except for Nick (I hate him!!)
- The guy from Obama's campaign who keeps spamming me for $5
- Helen Mirren when she speaks
- The Spaghetti Cat

I'm all for hiring vaginally endowed politicians, just not Sarah Palin. I'll bet the next big bombshell is that she doesn't really have a vagina.

Go Obama!


Anonymous said...

i think shes actually a "shit c*nt", (learned that one from the lads in England)not unlike the 2 girls 1 cup scenario

Anonymous said...

At first, I was thrilled to see you writing again. But that was before this post. My political views align more closely with yours than not but to call any woman a CUNT, much less one you've never even met, is simply a grand display of your ignorance and is a wide angle view into your true demeanor towards the fairer gender. You're a jackass if you don't know any better. Its one thing to rant on your little blog about your likes and dislikes and yet quite another to be an intolerant, hateful, slanderous, caustic pin-head who uses his forum to make outlandish attacks on the very existence of another individual. Do politics drive you to this level of degradation? You probably like Obama because you feel if you didn't you'd be considered racist. What are you a Madison grad (or dropout)??? Rhetorical - I already know. You’ve given me yet another reason to ponder why I should work with you. And THANKS for that!

Anonymous said...

Mike: I am just appalled that you would use the c-word to describe anything other than the c-word. The c-word is a sacred institution of our society (indeed, it is the origin of our society) and it denigrates all c-words to call Palin a c-word. P.S. I am not glad you are writing again!!!

Anonymous said...

Ha, when I was reading your post I thought to myself "this guy must have a small penis or something to be this angry." Then I read your comment about O'Reilly. The irony.

Anonymous said...

for why upset anonymous, mike? For why?

On a serious note, this language is inappropriate, and i apologize for encouraging it. I think its perfectly natural for most people to have a reactionary side in regards to this subject. But condemning, complaining or criticizing is *not* the done thing. Hate begets hate, bottom line.

Sorry anonymous. Please don't forsake me:)

linda rubright said...

Palin is a cunt. Well put Gellman. Will you please go in your garage, paint that on a sign and go stand next to the guy on Colfax with his painted sign re: the Clinton's being satan and blog about what happens?
Linda R.

Anonymous said...

pathetic... shows how desperate and disgusting you can get. your write up shows nothing decent about urself but exposes so much of venom and hatred within you. why so much of hate? looks like a case of sour grapes or maybe you have skipped your medications.

Unknown said...

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