Liberal Libertarian

For all intents and purposes, I should be a Democrat. I'm an East Coast Jew. I live in Denver. I believe in human rights. I'm pro-environment. And, I love abortion. Recently, after a long discussion about politics with a devout Republican, I determined two things: I can't stand discussing politics and I am a Libertarian.

Wikipedia defines Libertarianism as, "a label used by a broad spectrum of political philosophies which prioritize individual liberty and minimize, or eliminate, the role of the state." Ever since I got kicked out of summer camp for refusing to shower, I've been against authority. I spent the following 30 years doing everything I could to avoid anybody telling me what to do. Strangely though, when it came to politics, I aligned myself with the political party that hangs its hat on telling everybody what to do.

I hate authority!

I hate that we can't smoke in bars. It should be up to the bar owners to decide whether they want cancer breeders (like myself) in their establishments and it should be up to the drinkers to decide if they want to go to said bars.

I hate that drugs of all kinds are illegal. If we want to trip on acid or snort cocaine or shoot heroin, we should be able to do it. If we get fucked up, so be it. If we die, so be it. It's our decision.

I hate that there are seat belt laws and helmet laws and photo radars and speed traps. Who is the government to say how safe we should be in the cars that we power with the gas that costs so much because of the government's over-regulation?

We should be able to carry guns. We should be able to curse on television. We should be able to own pitbulls. And, we should be able to earn as much money as we can without government interference.

Philosophically, I'm a Libertarian.

Now, you may be asking - is Iron Mike pulling a Dennis Miller and suddenly going right wing in order to get a show on Fox News? Not at all. I've just realized that because of the influence of Hollywood, The Grateful Dead, and the upper middle class "intelligencia", I've been fooled into thinking I'm one thing when I'm really something else.

Who am I going to vote for on November 4th? I'm wholeheartedly voting for Obama. Libertarianism is undoubtedly a great philosophy. However, in this country of lemmings, it's completely unrealistic. Politicians who represent The Libertarian Party are wackos who have as much chance of getting into office as Ralph Nader or Ron Paul. I can't fucking stand Bush or McCain or any other Republican. If I don't want humans telling me what to do, I definitely don't want to be guided by religion.

So, what's left? Somebody other than a Republican. Somebody who cares about people. Somebody who is in no way connected to the current administration. Somebody who will be telling me what to do, but at least make me feel good about it. Somebody named Barack Obama.

What does that make me? A Liberal Libertarian. We're strong. We're proud. We're oxymoronic.

By the way,It does my heart good to see that a man who is half African American could be considered for the top office in our country. I can't wait until a whole African American or a half Jew or a quarter Mexican can be in the same situation, but that's another blog post.